Let Me Bring Light

Jason had an appointment with his kidney doctor this afternoon.  He is currently at 14% function, and fairly stable with lab results.  We are tweaking some medications for blood pressure, phosphorus, and parathyroid.  The next step will be a catheter surgically placed in his abdomen for dialysis.  The doctor normally prefers this be done a few weeks to a month before starting dialysis to allow the site time to heal.  She is hoping we can put this off until after the holidays. Jason has started to experience some nausea off and on, which may be an indication that dialysis will be needed soon.  She suggested we try Prevacid to see if this can buy us more time.  
We continue to be amazed by the changes in Jason since stopping his anti-seizure medicine.  This was the first year since his brain injury that he remembered the date of my birthday.  When we woke up that morning, I asked if he knew what day it was.  He replied, "You didn't honestly think I could forget your birthday, did you?"  Later he smirked and asked, "So, how's life over there on that side of 40?" Eli is slowly adjusting to the increase in attention from his father. Jason has rarely passed by Eli's bedroom door without remarking on the state of its contents.  He has also been making suggestions on how to improve Eli's occasional bouts with moodiness.  The other day when Eli didn't react after Jason asked him to do something, Jason looked at me and said, "Excuse me, honey, but does my voice work?"  
Last week, Jason's thumb paused a moment on the remote during his normal leisurely channel surfing.  While he lingered on a PBS program, I became acquainted with the Canadian Tenors for the first time.  I later found this song, which has stayed with me.  I pray for this spirit of looking beyond my own little world to actively impact the lives of those around me.